I celebrated my birthday at the weekend.  I received wonderful wishes by video, text and phone, as well as birthday cards and gifts.  I felt seen and celebrated by my loved ones.  I was delighted and I enjoyed receiving all this goodness.

It wasn't always this way.  

For the longest time, I was entrenched in the idea that it's immodest to receive and it's infinitely better to give than to receive.  I'd feel really good about giving to others - time, money, energy, hugs, words of encouragement.  Yet I'd feel awkward and guilty when other people gave back to me!  

It eventually dawned on me that this was the opposite of a win-win situation.  I imagined how I'd feel if every one of my acts of giving was met with the recipient feeling bad about receiving my gift.  I'd feel bad that they felt bad.  Perhaps I'd avoid giving a gift the next time to avoid creating these bad feelings all around.  This would perpetuate the opposite of the joy and delight I get from giving!

I realised that giving and receiving are opposite ends of the same coin.  You can't have one without the other, and so, is it really true that giving is better than the receiving?  No.  Not at all.  

If someone is giving, then the equal and opposite action is receiving.  It's a dynamic that perfectly expresses the reciprocity of life.

The giver has an opportunity to express their generosity to the receiver.  The receiver feels appreciated as a result of the giver's thoughtfulness.  Both sides feel lit up and joyful from this experience of generosity and appreciation.  Win-win.

As much as I enjoy giving all manner of gifts, I've learnt over time to enjoy receiving gifts with the same open heart as I give.